September 18, 2008

RealAge.com, or Yet One More Example of Everyone Thinking I am in High School


The other day I took the Real Age test, and it turns out I am 15.7.  

Of course I am.  Not only am I a decade younger in physical appearance, but it is now confirmed that the age of my body/health is also at a high school level.  

So, once you take the test they (the computational computer gods) tell you what factors played a major role in making you older or younger than you really are.  My summary went something like this:  good job avoiding second hand smoke and doing cardio activity, bad job not knowing your cholesterol levels and not having a dog.  
Yes, that's right, apparently one of the few negative factors that RealAge.com felt the need to point out was that I do not have a dog, and that is apparently going to cause wrinkles and arthritis and general premature old age.

Here is their suggestion:

Bring home a furry friend!  Get a dog if possible.  
Here's why:  For many people, having a dog reduces stress.  It also increases your physical activity because they need daily walks and playtime.

OK.  Physical activity.  True.  
Friendly furry friend.  True. 

Reduces stress?  I'm going to have to go with NO.  

Anything that would require walking multiple times a day, with disregard for hurricanes, blizzards, or anytime before 8 a.m.  = stress
Anything that barks and drools and slobbers and sheds and destroys an otherwise lovely home = stress
Anything that scampers on four legs and takes up an inordinate amount of room = stress
Anything that is an animal, but people feel the need to treat like a human being = stress

My heart has chilled to its normal animal-hating state.  Hooray!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

I agree. Dogs equal stress. Also cats. Get a fish tank, they are clean, do not bark, barf or pee on your legs.

Anonymous said...

wow that was such a long test. But well worth it.

Anonymous said...

it says i'm 25 :( because i don't exercise enough and i don't know what my cholesterol is. stupid test